From the movie, The Perks of Being a Wallflower
My final post and farewell to THST2450.
I chose this GIF because it resonated with me, and what better way to end than to get a GIF from a media film? As much as I am slow at adapting and change-averse, I have to admit and acknowledge that Change really is the only constant in life. I tend to live in the past because I am a sentimental person, always holding on to attachments from the past, unwilling to move on. It takes me a lot of courage to let go, because I am very stubborn and I’d always hold on till the very end, even when the situation seemed utterly hopeless I’d desperately keep finding ways to invent hope. Some people call this dogmatism, which in my opinion can be both a good and bad thing depending on how you perceive it and the situation that follows. Nicely put, it’s perseverance. Harshly put, it’s being wishy-washy.
Like I had mentioned in my farewell letter, this class has been an eye-opener. It is undoubtedly the most interesting out of the 5 courses I have taken this semester. Each Tuesday I actually look forward to going for class, discussing about every and any issue under the sky, gaining so much insights from my classmates.
It’s sad that this class has come to an end, knowing that when I go back to Singapore, I will never, ever have a similar experience again. (It’s been such a long while since I have had a class birthday party of food) But it’s also good because the fact that this class setting and atmosphere was so unique, it makes the memory that much more special and deeply etched in my mind.
Thank you to everyone who has been an irreplaceable part of THST 2450, it has been a good, crazy, fun, roller coaster ride with you guys :) And congratulations, we have survived and come out unscathed from yet another grueling semester in school! From here on, I wish all of you the best in anything and everything you do, and may you have the brightest future ahead and shine like a star in your own special way :)
Thank you Daphne for this beautiful farewell. #mystudentsareawesome
Who made the world?
Who made the swan, and the black bear?
Who made the grasshopper?
This grasshopper, I mean - the one who has flung herself out of the grass, the one who is eating sugar out of my hand, who is moving her jaws back and forth instead of up and down - who is gazing around with her enormous and complicated eyes.
Now she lifts her pale forearms and thoroughly washes her face. Now she snaps her wings open, and floats away.
I don’t know exactly what a prayer is.
I do know how to pay attention,
how to fall down into the grass,
how to kneel down in the grass,
how to be idle and blessed,
how to stroll through the fields,
which is what I have been doing all day.
Tell me, what else should I have done?
Doesn’t everything die at last, and too soon?
Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?—
The Summer Day, Mary Oliver
(my favourite poem)
what I’ve experienced that last week, trying to write a grant
Writing in my brain: Beautiful flowing sentences full of powerful phrases and enigmatically witty dialogue.
Writing on the page: They did the thing and said some stuff. There was snark.
My student's relationship with her computer; I love this writing!
- Me: Hello computer, what kind of relationship do I have with you?
- Computer: Well, considering how much time we spend together, we sure are pretty damn close!
- Me: That is true, sometimes I feel like I spend too much time on you it's becoming unhealthy. Don't you think so?
- Computer: As much as I enjoy basking in all the undivided attention you are giving me, I must admit it gets tiring for me sometimes. Especially when you leave me on with programs you don't even use running in the background! Don't your eyes get tired?
- Me: Actually... no! Haha. I don't actually physically feel like my eyes get tired, though I know it's pretty detrimental for my eyesight to be looking at you for long hours on end. I can't help it, you see. You are just such great company and multi-functional, so useful! Just look at the array of things I can do with you: Skype and stay connected with my family, do research for my academics, Facebook and stay connected with friends, listen to the radio (which is what I'm doing now), working on assignments (which is also what I am doing now), research for places of interests to visit, booking transport and accommodation tickets, liaising with relevant personnel, the list is endless! I'm so sorry I cause you to overwork sometimes, please don't leave me :(
- Computer: WOW, I didn't know I was that capable! Okay, I'll try my best to be up and running for you as long as I can. But no guarantees, I'm getting old, man. It's been a great 4 years of ups and downs with you.
- Me: I know! Every time you show signs of failing or collapsing (screen freeze, sound system fizzes, hinge coming out, blue screens), I get a little mini panic and heart attack, wondering if you're leaving without saying goodbye. But then again, it kind of scares me to realize how reliant I actually am on you to get by daily life. This one-way affection is getting out-of-hand and makes me feel vulnerable to the tantrums you throw (when your screen freezes).
- Computer: Ha ha ha, you can't help it when the ball is now in my court! I have the upper hand in the game and you had better treat me nicely (such as letting me rest and not leave me running on overnight or throwing me around). Then maybe, I'll consider returning your affections and operate smoothly to keep you connected to the rest of the world via the internet and social media. But then again, sometimes the internet just screws up and that's totally out of my control because the problem lies with the internet provider!
- Me: Yes sir! Or ma'am. Whichever gender you like. Hahaha. I have never thrown you around! I always take great care of my belongings. And I will try not to spend too much time on you and curb my reliance so you can rest :) (And my eyes can rest too!)
- Okay, I should stop this crazy monologue now.
- (It's my first time experimenting with this format/style of writing! Please be nice and pardon me if it was too lame or cheesy...)